The Perfect Marriage Cocktail

By - Shaneka McClarty On Mar 27, 2014

The Perfect Marriage Cocktail

I believe bartenders are the ultimate cocktail magicians. A really good mixologist is creative and knowledgeable of what's needed and how much is required for a delicious drink. As a result, they can make an alcoholic drink taste like a fruity beverage. But there is a particular mixture of ingredients needed to make a healthy marriage cocktail that will ensure longevity and bliss. Below is the recipe for a healthy marriage cocktail.

First, start out by mixing in good communication skills. I believe effective, good communication begins with our character. It is difficult to communicate with a stubborn, hot-headed, dishonest, manipulative or insecure person.  Character determines the level of emotional maturity and emotional intelligence a person may have in order to be honest, genuine, a good listener and respectful.

Next, add in equal measures of respect, trust, patience, support and love. The love couples display towards one another is like the ice in a drink; it maintains the temperature of the relationship. When there is love you know you are desired, admired and wanted. When the ice melts (or the love fades) then you do not feel emotionally connected to your spouse.

Trust is like vodka. It is clear in color but you know that it is in the mixture because you can taste it. A healthy marriage needs a clear understanding on the power of trust. Secrecy violates trust. Lies violate trust. Deception violates trust. Often couples want to place a boundary on trust; however the authenticity of trust requires you to surrender to the unknown. These are the things you cannot see or predict. Trusting your spouse is believing in the character of the person and the love they've demonstrated. It is not fair to say, "I will trust you if..." There is no fear in trusting; only faith.

Patience and support are the ying and yang of bitter and sweet. You cannot have one without the other as they each create balance and harmony. Being patient in a marriage requires self-control and during the periods of patience, support is needed to build up, encourage and empower your spouse. Patience and support reflect 'you care' and your spouse 'matters' to you. You must give support emotionally, mentally, physically, financially and spiritually. Patience, on the other hand, is a vessel for self-discovery and growth in the marriage. The waiting period, when honored, is the vessel for couples to rest, reflect and prepare strategically for their future.

Lastly, garnish your marital cocktail with respect. A marriage with respect symbolizes the honor you have for your spouse. Whenever your words and actions become dishonorable it becomes hurtful and disrespectful towards your spouse which lends for a bitter cocktail.

You can make your marriage cocktail as strong and sweet as you'd like it to be. It all depends on what ingredients you use and how much. Go ahead and take a sip of your marriage and see how it tastes to you. Are you a good mixologist? What ingredients are missing in your marriage?

Have a sweet day,
Shaneka

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