Friends, this month marks the “3″ year anniversary of my divorce. Three years ago, I found myself exiting the courthouse in downtown Houston. As the doors opened and I walked out as a divorced woman, I was relieved. A burden had been lifted and a bad marriage had finally come to an end. I was set free and I was at peace...*sigh*
Shortly, afterwards the reality of divorce set in. I was once again single. But I wasn’t just a single woman this time around. I was now labeled…as a “divorced” single mom. Initially, it took time just for me to assess the emotional damage from divorce to begin to properly heal. My intent was to not carry “old’ baggage into my new found life. I desired a fresh start. Friends, don’t we all? When things don’t turn out as we plan, when we decide to pick up the pieces we want to start fresh…and we should.
But how do we start fresh? How do we “officially” move forward in life and not carry with us the “baggage” from our past? I have often been reminded that divorce is similar to a death. That we must mourn through the grief of a marriage that will no longer be. With the signing of the divorce papers, the two that were once vowed to become one are no more. And although divorce is extremely, painful, eventually the pain subsides. Within time, the desire to date will resume and life goes on…….
Friends, I do not wish to glorify the decision to divorce, no, not at all. I believe that God’s grace is sufficient to cover any marriage. In my own situation, divorce, was a personal decision and it is also one that I do not regret. Each person must decide in life what he/she can and cannot live with that will allow us to have peace in life…in this lifetime.
When the “dust” settles and we have successfully healed from the pain of divorce, we may then decide to pursue love once again. Dating after divorce may initially seem scary. You may now have children involved and you want to be careful with whom you invite into the lives of your children. Rightfully so. You may also be recovering from the “scars” of divorce, but time and prayer heals all wounds. So please be patient with yourself.
Friends, take your time, heal from the scars of divorce and be open to new possibilities in this new phase in your life. In this season, embrace the new YOU. You are more mature, wiser, and more confident as an individual. It is not the pain that you have experienced in life that defines you instead you will discover that you are strengthened by your pain through internal growth.
Ask yourself, are you willing to open your heart to new possibilities after divorce by embracing the new YOU?
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